165TO120

I am trying to follow ADF(Alternate Day Fasting). Some times I succeed and sometimes I don't. I have to see how far I can do this. For now I weigh 144.4Lbs. 

week 24 : 146 Lbs

The past 4 days was a binge eating roller coaster. I could not control eating! Its like the urge to feed myself even though I was full and not hungry. The heaviness in my stomach was satisfying even though I was guilty of eating food. This is usual for me before my periods. I am not sure if I had eaten the regular calories and feeling guilty or really really eating bad but the 5 day fasting compensated, I now weigh  148 Lbs.

Such a stubborn nerve its got Hypothyroidism! I mean, it dries out the energy,effort,emotion in a person. The lazy days  , irregular periods, mood swings , pmd are real. The harder its getting to lose even an ounce of weight. How can I do this? How can I reach my goal?

Its true, I never in my life had the need nor the urge to swear, but Today I sweared to myself like I never before. I mean, what can I say, For the past months I have been starving my self. The few two weeks I did ADF(Alternate day Fasting) no change in my scale. Then for self healing and cleansing I planned to do 5 day fasting. Today I was supposed to do my fast but could not stop from weighing my self but I did. And, the scale did.not.budge. Oh Man the frustration I got, oh man! Why is my body so stubborn to lose even a bit? why???! I do not understand?! I do not know what I am doing wrong (even with fasting). I have to get out of the plateau, I mean its been 2 months since I have seen any change in my weight, if I guess correctly, ever since my periods have delayed I saw the change my body holding on to the weight like anything! What strategy should I apply?? Exercise?! I am feeling the sluggishness like anything, that is the reason why I have been trying fasting and ADF and OM...

I have blown up on the 5th day fasting. I had a cup of soup and chips( a lot  ) A typical me, setting up for a failure always! And I did not even lose a pound on the 4 day fasting! Again a typical result as every time . 

Its was little smooth. I was little hungry during the lunch time but I had water and a half a pear.Evening was also fine too. Had some tea and lots of water. 

It was an okay day! I am usually good all day except the lunch and dinner time! I struggle not because I am hungry but because of my anxiety, anxiety that I may not be able to continue the rest of the fast If I do not eat a bit! Evening was very difficult.I gave in to my temptations and had a cup of vegetable broth and a cup of cooked cabbage. ! I was disappointed  but I promised that I wont let this ruin the rest of my fasting days. But one thing I observed was I did not crave junk food. Even the little bit of food I had I appreciated it so much, savored every single bite. I was very thankful for the food. Anyway moving on to the next day!